Journey Within: The Cycle of a Pilgrimage

For years now, I’ve been circumambulating the concept of pilgrimage and the cycles of a pilgrimage of the soul. What does it mean to go on a pilgrimage? What is the purpose? What exactly makes the pilgrimage “soulful”? What about the simple practice of walking makes such a profound alchemical process of the heart?

Pilgrimage Defined

To really know something, you must first start from the beginning. The most straightforward definition of pilgrimage is “a journey to a sacred place”. Investigating further, the Latin word "peregrinus" means foreign or from abroad. The prefix "per-" implies through or beyond, and "agri" means land. So, "peregrinus" refers to someone from beyond the land or a foreigner.

Pilgrimage has historically been associated with religious journeys, particularly in Christianity. However, the term has also been used more broadly to describe journeys with a significant purpose or goal, beyond religious contexts. As Phil Cousineau eloquently puts it, “Pilgrimage is to put the sole of your feet to the soul of the world.”.

Personally, I’ve come to describe pilgrimage as the journey that you are deeply called to go on, a ritualized journey that leads you closer to your truest version of yourself.

Soul Defined

How do you describe a color to someone who cannot see? The concept of the soul is enigmatic, much like fine art and poetry. In ancient Greece, the term for soul was psyche. For Greek philosophers and poets, the psyche referred to the breath.

In The Care of the Soul, Thomas Moore defines soul as, “Not a thing but a quality or dimension of experiencing life and ourselves. It has to do with depth, value, relatedness, heart and personal substance.” Soul is what gives our life depth and richness. When we’re living a “soulful life”, we are living a life steeped in meaning, purpose, heart, and being in an intimate relationship with the material that arises in our day to day.

Each person’s individuality is held in their soul, like the uniqueness of a snowflake, not one is the same. Your soul operates as an agent of positive change in the world and on a personal level, to make yourself whole. To heal yourself through listening to the beckoning of the soul means to heal the world.

How can you be in relationship with the soul as a bridge to your most heartfelt purposes? Your soul doesn’t speak in clear, written messages. It doesn’t speak in commandments and definitely isn’t rooted in societal norms. It is something so much deeper, more mysterious, and it communicates through subtlety, images, symbols, feelings, synchronicities, and intuition. It begs us to listen and trust, to follow the path even though we seldom can see past the step in front of us. In return, it promises the reward of a meaningful life, something that most people are starved of in this world of empty material excess.

The Cycle of a Pilgrimage

The cycle of a pilgrimage is similar to that of the hero’s journey as Joseph Campbell describes in “The Hero with a Thousand Faces”. The first, vital phase is the Soul’s Calling. This is often the most intimidating step as it asks the soon-to-be pilgrim to leave behind the familiar and go step out into the unknown. From there, pilgrims begin the Initiation process leading up to the moment they take their first step on the pilgrimage. After many ups and downs, suddenly pilgrims find themselves in the Heart of the Pilgrimage. During this phase, the inner and outer journey are rich with possibilities as insights and synchronicities come forth. Finally, the End of the Pilgrimage is near, bringing complex emotions. As the Return approaches, pilgrims decide what meaning they make of their pilgrimage and bring what they learned back home along with a transformed version of themselves.

The Soul’s Calling

The calling looks different for everyone. It could be a consistent longing, an inner knowing that quietly tugs at your heart, urging you to just go. For others, it is as sudden as a lightning strike. In an instant, your day to day routine and goals feel empty or meaningless, and you are no longer satisfied doing the things you have done before. The calling often seems random or unexpected - a dream that left you replaying it in your head all day, overhearing a conversation on the train about the pilgrimage route, or any number of other occurrences like that.

The calling is there as a messenger, signifying that it is time to embark on a journey of self discovery, a spiritual quest. It’s time to step away from what you know and begin the descent into the unknown.

The term “descent” is used intentionally here, as this term is commonly shared amongst religious traditions, cultures, and myths. Going down represents a willingness to confront the depths of one's being or the challenges of the unknown.

Going down, whether into the unknown, on a spiritual pilgrimage, or into the underworld, is often metaphorically associated with delving into the depths of the self or the mysteries of existence. It represents a journey into the unconscious mind or hidden realms.

Descending is often accompanied by challenges and trials, symbolizing the hardships and transformative experiences one must face to gain wisdom or achieve spiritual growth.

Refusal of the Soul’s Calling

You may push the invitation away, simply because it seems so implausible. “You have far too many commitments already, how could you drop everything and leave? Who will take care of the dog? This is ridiculous!” you’ll think. Underneath it all, you may feel a dark, terrifying cloud of fear and doubt. “What happens if I can’t do it? How will I explain this to my partner? What is the point anyway?” The questions endlessly pile up, yet the calling patiently persists. At some point, you realize that it’s more challenging to ignore than it is to say ‘yes’ to your soul’s calling.

Initiation

Crossing the Threshold - Beginning your Pilgrimage

After much preparation including training, packing, and getting guidance from a mentor or someone who’s walked the pilgrimage before, it is time to leave the familiar and enter the unknown, marking the beginning of your pilgrimage.

Crossing the threshold involves symbolically marking the beginning of your journey. On the Camino de Santiago, pilgrims place a shell on their backpack, which signifies they’re a pilgrim on the road to Santiago. On Japan’s Shikoku Pilgrimage, pilgrims wear the white robe to officially symbolize their becoming a pilgrim.

As Bill Plotkin explains in his book Soulcraft, “Crossing that threshold into your uncharted future is an act of great courage and self-compassion, and it changes your relationship to life in a fundamental way. It embodies your willingness to employ a new form of risk-taking, to consciously choose growth-stimulating, soul-nourishing conflicts, to live through the accompanying anxiety, and to accept your life as open-ended and unpredictable.”

Make it intentional - The night before your pilgrimage, take some time to be alone. In your journal, write a couple of aspirations for the journey ahead.

The Start of your Journey: Peaks and Valleys

The first half of a pilgrimage can look different for everyone. Common themes for this part of the journey include excitement, nervousness, mental and physical challenges, doubt, friendships, and plenty of obstacles.

Similar to the analogy of the pearl evolving through the persistent friction of a grain of sand in an oyster, you can imagine this phase as the development of a blister. While not the most appealing analogy, it definitely captures the essence.

As you face numerous challenges, the friction forms a blister, causing discomfort. However, over time, the blister transforms into a callous, allowing you to walk with ease and endurance.

Often, this phase can include moments of serious doubt when you question everything. You may think, “What did I get myself into? Am I really cut out for this? I wish I could go back to the comfort of my life back home.”

There’s a fine balance between pushing yourself and knowing when to bring in self care. For instance, pushing yourself to walk another 5 kilometers may be exactly what you need to challenge yourself and step out of your comfort zone, yet if your ankle is throbbing and each step is painful, maybe it’s your sign to nurse your injury. There’s no need to walk 40km a day just to prove that you can.

Once while I was walking the Camino de Santiago in Spain, I met an older French man who told me that he had to be the first person in the hostel to wake up in the morning, and he absolutely had to be the fastest person on the trail. I felt a wave of sadness as he told me this. I asked him, “What would happen if you intentionally decided to walk the slowest tomorrow?” He paused to ponder the question for a moment, and then said to me, “So, where did you say you were from again?” Sometimes people are not willing to go there.

Especially in the United States, where ambition is an underlying quality that pervades pretty much everything, we have to be dedicated to not making our pilgrimage another self-improvement project. You’re not here to change yourself. You’re here to become more of who you really are. This means listening to yourself, listening to your body, and following your intuition.

Turning Point

At some point, though, you are confronted with the choice: Will you choose to make this a meaningful journey? The decision is all yours.

Remember your why: In the midst of challenging times during your pilgrimage, remember why you decided to answer the calling in the first place. Why are you here?

The Heart of the Pilgrimage

The heart of the pilgrimage refers to the point of the pilgrimage in which you’re settled into your new routine, the doubts and discomforts are no longer the prominent characteristics of your experience, and you begin to reap the benefits of slowing down, staying present, and listening from the heart.

Outer journey

The outer journey is whatever is happening in the physical world along your pilgrimage: the views, the arduous path, the sun, rain, clouds, or wind, the people you meet, the conversations you have, the food you eat…you get the idea. All of this is half of your journey, and it will shape a big part of what your experience will be. There is only so much you can plan for, and the rest is up to whatever presents itself to you along the way. Using mindfulness of the senses on your walk will enrich your experience tenfold.

Inner journey

The inner journey, on the other hand, is everything that’s happening internally. This includes your thoughts and emotions, and even your dreams at night when you’re asleep. Pilgrimage especially includes the daily practice of slowing down, savoring, and staying curious about what the soul really asks of you. What about your life back home should change, if anything? Why are you walking? What is the point of this pilgrimage? All these questions and more can be reflected on while balancing leaving the questions behind and focusing on the outer journey with mindfulness.

Walking with a Heart of Gladness

When your mind is steady from the consistent walking, time in nature, nourishment from enriching conversations and beautiful places, you may begin to experience the delight of pilgrimage. Some examples of this include:

Spontaneous insights
Synchronicity like meeting the right person at the right time
Dreams that answer your questions or solve a problem
A sense of ease, joy, enchantment with the world
A feeling of relaxation and gratitude
Trust in your path - everything seems to make sense
Strong surges of creativity that feel effortless
Mysterious connection with nature or animals

During this phase, the task is to stay present. Take time to record your insights through journaling and remember that this too shall pass, so allow yourself to take it in with an open heart without grasping.

“Exquisite beauty
is often hidden
in life's fragile,
fleeting moments.”
-John Mark Green

Presence pause: Take 2-3 minutes to bring your awareness fully into the present moment. Take in both your outer world (sights, sounds, smells, temperature, the texture of your clothes on your skin, etc.) and your inner world (feeling tone, thoughts, breath). Be fully immersed in this moment, as if you’re taking a snapshot and storing it in your memory. Practice this multiple times throughout the day.

Steven Harper taught me the Presence Pause in his Gestalt Practice workshop at Esalen.

The Return

The End of the Pilgrimage

And just like that…like the blink of an eye, your journey will be reaching its end point.

As you approach the end of your pilgrimage, you will notice many emotions arise. While some experience a sense of sadness as their journey comes to a close, others feel a sense of relief. The emotions can vary widely. The saying “How you do anything is how you do everything” is especially telling as the final phase of your pilgrimage becomes a poignant reflection of life as a whole. Are you rushing? Are you delaying the inevitable?

The end of your pilgrimage could be marked by a sacred place like a church or shrine, or it could simply be time for you to be on your way home. Regardless of the timeline, similarly to the rest of your pilgrimage, this phase is full of symbolism and metaphor.

Remember, pilgrimage is not just about reaching a physical place—it's about every step taken with intention and mindfulness. It’s an undulating journey with no real end to it.

Give yourself time to feel what you’re feeling, honoring the emotions that surface and know that you’re in a deep process of inner alchemy - allow yourself to simply be in this for a while.

Integration

The return from a pilgrimage is a delicate, sometimes challenging transition from the numinous back to the routine of daily life and responsibilities. To ensure an easeful return, it is crucial to practice mindfulness and self-compassion. Whether it's a daily moment of reflection, an intentional walk in your neighborhood, or a simple act of kindness, these practices serve as bridges, connecting the sacred with the ordinary and allowing the pilgrimage's essence to permeate daily life.

It’s difficult to put into words and summarize your pilgrimage, as you’ll likely still be processing it yourself. A helpful rule of thumb would be that the integration period lasts half the amount of your pilgrimage. For example, if your pilgrimage lasted one month, then the integration period would be at least two weeks.

It’s helpful to initially keep your experience close as you return home, meaning that when people ask, “How was your trip?”, they usually don’t have much time or interest to hear the innermost workings of your experience. They are usually just being polite, and knowing that ahead of time can save confusion and hurt feelings. Personally, I’ve found that focusing on the other person, leading with curiosity on their life and what they’ve been up to, tends to give myself space and protect the meaningful moments from pilgrimage from being lessened through small talk.

Making Meaning

In the months after your pilgrimage, you’ll be in a time of processing and making meaning.

One practice that has been helpful for me is the 3 Bridges. After a couple of months since your pilgrimage, take time to reflect on a single symbol, word or phrase, or a mindfulness practice that you used on your pilgrimage. Don’t overthink it! It may be helpful to do a short meditation practice to focus the mind before you ask yourself:

When reflecting on the journey, what is the most prominent image or symbol (if any) that comes up?
What word or phrase (if any) defines my pilgrimage? (ex: trust yourself, be present)
Which mindfulness practice did you work with most on your pilgrimage? (ex: mindfulness of sound, presence pause, etc.)

Once you have these 3 bridges in mind (it could also be just 1 of the 3 - that is fine), spend time daily or weekly relating to it. For instance, if your symbol was a hummingbird - make a photo of a hummingbird your phone background, draw pictures in your journal, or write a note to the hummingbird and reply as if you were a hummingbird. In your daily life, you may continue to see hummingbirds and this will be your bridge - your mindfulness anchor - to your pilgrimage. In Jungian terms, this symbol is your bridge to the unconscious, which you can begin to form a relationship with, making the mysterious, numinous a part of your daily life.

Pay extra attention to your dreams during this time, and be in relationship with the images and symbols that arise. Again, this is a potent time for meaning making.

Journal using the post-pilgrimage reflection guide by the Pilgrim House. At some point, you will feel ready to share your reflections with a trusted friend, family member, or mentor.

Give Back

Additionally, sharing the lessons learned during the pilgrimage with the community becomes a cornerstone of integration. Through storytelling and embodying the lessons learned, you’re able to share your experiences with others, offering guidance and inspiration. This integration is not just a personal endeavor; it becomes a gift to the community, fostering a ripple effect of positive transformation. This could look differently for each person. To some pilgrims, they realize they’d like to give back to their community through volunteering with specific organizations. However you’re inspired to give back, the return becomes a continuation of the journey—a perpetual pilgrimage where every moment holds the potential for spiritual growth and connection.

Closing

In conclusion, the cycle of a pilgrimage is not merely a journey with a defined endpoint. It is an ongoing, evolving dance with the sacred, a continuum of growth and transformation that extends far beyond the physical footsteps you've taken. Trust yourself, and the rest will follow.

May you be happy.

May your heart always be open.

May your journey always be true.